TITLE: Secret Weapons: Technically, there’s only ONE weapon…unless you’re counting Jazz in a symbol---Ooooohhhhhh.
LOGO:“Beware the Twisted Sister!”
EPISODE #: 31
SEASON: 2
AIRDATE: Dec. 9, 2005
DIRECTOR: Butch Hartman, Wincat Alcala, Kevin Petrilak
STORY: Steve Marmel
WRITERS: Marty Isenberg
STORYBOARD: Butch Hartman, Ray Angrum, Robb Pratt, Shaunt Nigoghossian
ART DIRECTIONS: George Goodchild
MUSIC: Guy Moon
APPEARANCE: Danny and Jazz, Tucker and Sam, Vlad, Jack and Maddie, various students of Casper High
GHOST APPEARANCE: Skulker = Ghost X, Lunch Lady = Lunch-A-Belle, Box Ghost = Crate Creep, Klemper = Friendly...
FENTON GADGET APPEARANCE: Ecto Converter, Fenton Thermos, Fenton Anti-Creep Stick, Jack-o-Nine Tails, Fenton RV, Fenton Ecto-Suit (souped up)
LESSON: Sorry, I'm fresh out of witty banters.
SUMMARY: “I can’t believe we sat through all three "Cyber Zombie Commando" movies.” Sam states as she and Tucker casually waltzes out of the theaters, stretching after endless hours of sitting. Tucker would prefer a little more cyber and less zombies. The two eye their surroundings, empty. More importantly, no Jazz in sight. Danny, having been invisible the whole time reappears next to his buddies. “Ever since Jazz found out I was fighting ghost, she’s been kinda--”
OMGJAZZINACONVEETIBLEWHOLEAPSANDTACKLESDANNY!
“--pushy.”
She shoves a Fenton Thermos onto Danny, warning him to prepare himself in advance. Danny tries to relax his sister, saying he’ll be aware because he’s ghost sense will let loose, which it does. Because there’s a ghost. Obviously. Period. Skulker flies past the four, Jazz herself shocked the devious entity has cornered Danny multiple times in the past. “Jazz, take it easy. There’s a rhythm to these things: ghosts attack, we exchange witty banters, I kick ghost butt, and we all go home having learned a valuable lesson about honesty or some such nonsense.” Sums up this series (and 90% of all other cartoons/superhero comic books) perfectly. Jazz takes notes of these (no, really, she does). She then asks why Skulker isn’t attacking him, but whizzing off.
“What? No attack? He’s ignoring me?!” Danny cries. Skulker sneaks past Axion Lab with relative ease by phasing through locked doors while on invisible mode. He enters a room where he finds what he’s been looking for: Bloodstream nanobots. Danny asks what they are when he sneaks up from behind. Skulker, remaining quiet nets Danny, then bolts. Danny frees himself, “You didn’t even call me “whelp!” Jazz drives Sam and Tucker to Axion Lab as the Goth girl bluntly tells her Danny’s been doing find without her. Jazz think she can up the ante and proceeds to break out the thermos upon Skulker’s exit. Free candy for anyone who can tell me how she was able to spot the ghosts when they were currently invisible. “You just received a one-way ticket to thermos land, ghost!” Jazz cries as she desperately tries to gain control of the Fenton Thermos. It proves too much for her and she trips backwards, her aim accidentally centering on Danny. Well, we know half-ghosts can get sucked into it; I assume they just have be in ghost mode to do so. Skulker flies off scot-free and Jazz receives death glares; Danny’s probably giving one inside, or marveling that he’s finally stuck inside a Fenton Thermos.
Jazz: *sheepish* Think I should work on my banter?
Tucker: *annoyed* Start with your aim.
*sigh* Remember when Tucker used to have lines? When Sam wasn’t the only one with an opinion? Back when he had a spotlight? Yeah, I missed that.
By school the next day, Tucker giggles over Danny’s six-hour entrapment inside the Fenton Thermos. A vengeful Danny gets Dash to shove him inside a locker (he knocks his books down from behind). While Sam frees Tucker (who knew she could decode locks?), she gives Danny hope that her slip-up will realize she sucks at the job. Jazz arrives on cue with news that she spent the night painstakingly researching Skulker or as she calls him, “Ghost X”, declaring he’s a “hunter of some sort”. She hands Danny her file, along with terrible witty banters, then skips away. Tucker makes another “Danny-inside-Fenton-Thermos” remark and he gets Kwan to shove Tucker back in the same locker. Danny then figures out a plan to get Jazz to interfere less if she feels like she’s being off some help. Ahh, reverse psychology. He and Sam walk off, leaving poor Tucker alone. Harsh, guys.
Their first fight is with Lunch Lady inside a butcher store. Jazz uses the Jack-o-Nine Tails and ends up getting Danny hogtied, slamming him to Lunch Lady, then inside a chit-lin bucket, Lunch Lady strangely absent here. Even worse, Jazz’s first time--FIRST TIME-- with the weapon may have been beginner’s luck, but she skillfully handled a ghost with the Jack-o-Nine Tails. Sheesh. Next up, Klemper who has frozen the waters of Floody Waters. He’s now chucking ice balls, whining for someone’s friendship. Uh, yeah, maybe you shouldn’t ask for a friend by administrating violence. Jazz retaliates with the Anti-Creep stick and is doing fine...until Klemper freezes the ground. She slips and smacks Danny, causing him to slam onto the water ride’s frozen walls, creating a small avalanche that lands on the Trio. And lastly, the Box Ghost--I’m sorry--the “Crate-Creep”. She ends up sucking Danny in the thermos…again. That’s a hat trick.
Jazz: That was a good night’s work, Danny. We caught three ghosts!
Danny: *pissed* No, actually, you caught one ghost three times, all of them ME!
They return home where Danny is close to telling Jazz off politely, but his pops grabs him to demonstrate the Fenton RV’s new Ecto-Converter, a device that uses a ghost’s natural energy to turn it into a constantly refilling fuel source. Damn, you could save a lot of gas that way. If it weren’t for the fact that the ghosts might severely be hurt from it (“If we hear it screaming, then we know it’s working“), Sam would approve. Jazz gleefully states there’s no ghosts around, emphasizing the keywords, “no ghosts around and we know a secret they don’t know”, much to Danny’s annoyance. Jazz gives Danny a friendly slap that careens the boy to the RV, his half-ghost hands accidentally charging the Ecto-Coverter and causing the RV to bolt with Fenton parents on top. “You really need to work on controlling your powers.” Jazz warns. That’s beyond Strike Three, little lady.
Danny sleeps for the night, leaving Skulker to sneak past his room to search Fenton lab. “And there I thought you weren’t hunting me anymore.” Danny sneaks up again. Skulker, what the hell? You did such a bang-up job in Axion Lab, how do you goof up and fly past a kid with a ghost sense trigger, THEN make a loud mess in Fenton Labs?
Skulker: Where is the Ecto-Converter?
Danny: See? That’s more like it, you make demands, I ignore them.
Skulker asks again. Danny answers with an Ecto Ray. The two then struggle as they fly out of Fenton Works, phasing past Jazz’s room who wakes up from the noise. Skulker snares Danny’s legs to Fenton Works and plans to beat out an answer, but Jazz strikes him with the Fenton RV’s own Ecto Ray. Then to prove the RV’s all that and a bag of chip, she says it’s loaded with the Ecto Converter. Ooooh, good timing, wrong execution. Skulker managed to gain the Ecto-Converter while Jazz busies herself (and her brother) by screwing up as usual. Jazz leaves the RV after Skulker exits with his prize to see if Danny's alright. He instead saves her the trouble and sucks himself in the thermos.
Danny hides with Sam and Tucker in the school janitor’s closet the next day to avoid Jazz. She finds them anyway and managed to compile a list of ghosts that associates with “Ghost X” after she concludes he’s building a super weapon. The list of ghosts having been taken from Danny’s private ghost files on his computer (with the super easy password access: Paulina Fenton). Jazz is taken back on Danny's refuse to reveal the true nature of Vlad Masters. “Because it’s none of your business!” Seriously, Jazz, who Danny wants to have a romantic fling with IS none of your beeswax. Sam and Tucker take this time to get out and do the “glad-I’m-an-only-child” dance. Danny lets off steam after holding it in for so long while Jazz meekly, but reassuringly states she only desires to help. “Nobody asked you to help! You’re a lousy ghost hunter, an overbearing sister, and an annoying, obnoxious, know-it-all who no respect for her brother’s privacy! So STOP HELPING!” By that point, a crowd of Casper High students have been listening in. Made worse when Jazz leaves the closet in tears.
Back home, Danny is woken by his parents, asking where Jazz is. He doesn’t know...and neither do they. So we draw our attention to Vlad who’s currently casting away Klemper from his basement lab (he refuses to be his friend). When he hears a doorbell (from all the way down there?! He better have a intercom connected to the basement), an angry Vlad storms to the front, now in human form to witness a crying Jazz who came via the Specter Speeder (because...it’s...fast? Seeing as how she seemed to get there in about a day’s travel).
Jazz: Oh, Uncle Vlad, I’ve runaway from home; my father’s an idiot, my brother hates me, and I wanna live with you.
Vlad: Wait, what was that?
Jazz: I’ve runaway from home?
Vlad: N-No, after that.
Jazz: My brother hates me?
Vlad: No, in the middle!
Jazz: My father’s an idiot?
Vlad: *joyous* That’s the one!
Vlad invites her in. In the meantime, Danny draws the conclusion that Jazz left to find Skulker to prove herself while the Fenton Folks continuously blather on her whereabouts. He excuses himself by saying he’s going to “skulk her” and makes his way to the Ghost Zone. The phone rings after, a call from Madison, Wisconsin. “It’s Vladdie!” Jack happily declares. Well, sorta. Jazz calls in to let them know she’s safe, but she just needs to get away from Danny for a bit. Maddie is none too pleased, but Vlad assures her she’s safe and just needs to, “as the young folks say, chill in.” Jazz corrects his slang ("It's Chill Out"). “T-That can’t be right.” He retorts. I am amused. Maddie isn’t and is close to calling it off it not for a misplace of words (her “Absolutely not” is cut off to just “Absolutely” by an enthusiastic Vlad). Jack reassures Jazz’s safety, then adds an emphasis that they have the house to themselves, if you catch his drift. Even the music gets saucy! Of course, Jack refers to the a game of checkers, much to Maddie’s annoyance. Oh, he ain’t getting any tonight!
Vlad hangs up the phone and says he’ll get the rest of Jazz’s stuff as soon as he gets the adoptive papers. He leaves Jazz alone who comments to herself, “Keep laughing, we’ll see who laughs last.” She remarks her banter is getting wittier. And we know now she has a double agenda. Danny meanwhile encounters Skulker who just left one of the many floating doors, Technus’ electro-rod in hand (remember back from “Attack of the Killer Garage Sale”--nice), leaving an angry Technus who was in the middle of a shower--foreshadowing the pink shower cap someone else will wears. Damn, for a techno geek, he's got some abs! No time for witty banters (Ooh, the many times the episode and subsequently this summary has said those two words), Danny combats Skulker. The hunter bests him easily with the Electro-Rod, then traps him inside some…transparent...cube...thing. Kinda remains me of that morph cube from Animorphs. He plans to deliver both to his employer.
Jazz scans the hallways of Vlad’s manor, sneaking behind the doors of...I don’t know, the manor’s library. She quietly witness Vlad heading to his secret lab via a secret door behind the fireplace (triggered by a football mantle, of course). Once he does, she scouts the room and finds his laptop. There she hacks in to find any info she needs on the Ecto-Converter and bloodstream nanobots. She finds pictures of Maddie instead. Jazz slams the laptop in disgust. Just be grateful they weren’t nude! The fireplace opens up again and the wily redhead grabs Vlad’s college year book (1981) and pretends to be absorbed in it’s contents. Vlad suspiciously questions her motives, but grows at ease when Jazz declares him to be a “looker” in college, then banging the mallet further by wondering why he and her mother never hooked up. Vlad gains a hug from Jazz.
Jazz: Keep hugging, we’ll see who hugs last.
Vlad: What?
Jazz: N-Nothing.
There’s too many good lines in this episode. Jazz later enters his secret lab (after sneaking around dramatically--no wonder she relates so well with Freakshow ) and finds not only the Ecto-Converter and Nanonbots, but the Fenton Ecto-Suit, locked up here the whole time. Yep, he’s building a secret weapon. She does a victory dance, by which I mean the moonwalk, bumping into a peeved Vlad who suspects her motives in the process. She sweet talks her way out by commenting on his awesome lab (much more then Jack’s) and saying he’d be a great pops. Vlad seems to turn a new leaf if it weren't for Skulker who enters with both the Electro-Rod and Danny. He wakes up in time to see Jazz in Vlad’s basement. “You two know each other?” Vlad asked. The two quickly tried to formulate an answer. I had to watch this repeatedly over time to understand this particular scene because surely Vlad would know Danny and Jazz do know each other. But then, this is the first time Jazz knows Danny as both Fenton AND Phantom, so therefore, the culminated question from Masters’ side. He then gets upset over Jazz’s betrayal, if not in a slightly mocking tone, but he finds a solution like the resourceful man that he is.
Vlad: Only one thing to do, I guess.
Jazz: Let us both go and let the courts figure it out?
Vlad: Oh, close.
Not even remotely. Vlad’s manor sports his own goddamn football field! There, he lights up the stadium (with an evil remote control--seriously) where still cubed Danny and Jazz in the Ecto-Suit gaze at Vlad’s mug on the big screen. There he explains the Ecto-Suit’s new and improved status, harnessed by the Ecto-Converter and Electro-rod to act as an endless fuel source like it did the RV prior. If the Ecto-Converter can do that, then what the hell is the point of the rod? Does it give it extra juice that can work the converter on the suit? The nanobots are meant to help the person wearing said suit to better control breathing and heart weight; in short, the suit won’t drain their energy as it did prior. But Vlad can with a push of a button should she betray him. Smart. Considering Danny wiped a shitload of skeletons from Pariah’s army, imagine Vlad in that suit. Super weapon indeed.
Danny tells Jazz to run. She declares she can do it herself. A frustrated Danny (nice animation with the hand there, fellows) cries out a harsh “Fine!” and the two bolt. Too bad the ghost shield Vlad made works on ghosts AND humans. All they got left is to combat to the death. Danny tells Jazz they need to fake their battles while making it look as real as possible, but Jazz continuously pummels him, if not for embarrassing her in school. Danny apologizes, but she’s not letting down…and Danny gets ANGRY. In what is possibly one of the most crowning moment of awesome for the titular character, Danny stops Jazz’s punches after he gets his act, grabs the suit like goddamn tin foil, then phases 90% of it underground like friggin’ paper towel. Yes, I’m the one who added in that CWoA in that list I just linked. It’s THAT awesome.
Danny tells Jazz to listen to him for once. Turns out, she was...by making them look as real as possible. If not a bit too real. Danny plays along while the two put on some bad, baaaaaad acting. Eventually he drops into unconscious, but gives a short wink to Jazz to let her know he’s a-okay. Jazz commences more bad acting that somehow fools Vlad. The billionaire accepts Jazz, saying she’s proven her worth. Danny on cue turns invisible and phases under the ground while Jazz delivers an Ecto-blast to Mr. Fruit Loop (the first insult she’s gotten right all episode), causing him to careen to the bleachers. Damn, that man has some endurance. Vlad pulls out the remote, “Have you forgotten that with a press of a button, I can end your resistance once and for--”
OMGDANNYPHASESFROMTHEGROUNDANDSTEALSHISREMOTE!
“--Oh, cheese logs.”
Vlad peeks in the bleachers and gets a face full of Ecto-Ray. Oh, SERIOUSLY!? Vlad’s THAT stupid? I honestly can’t believe this. I know he’s in the midst of emotional breakdown that both Jazz AND Danny offed him as well as refused his hospitality, but COME ON! Moving on before I turn this into a 20-page rant, Jazz and Danny make note of their bad acting (at least they acknowledged it!), then laughs it off. Vlad turns Plasmius to surprise Jazz, but it’s no news for her. Somehow they find time to write a sticky note (“No, not surprised”) post it to the suit, then activate the self-destruct sequence in-between Vlad's transformation. Danny and Jazz fly off, leaving what I can presume is a charred Plasimus. I’d say he’d have his ghost shield up, but hey, as long as we’re making him a complete idiot!
Danny and Jazz ride back home via Specter Speeder. Shouldn’t Danny be in his pjs? Jazz finally realizes she’s messed up a lot, but Danny apologizes and gains the epiphany that she can be helpful. She counters, saying she can help in smaller ways. Both of them content, Danny makes her a “reserved member of Team Phantom”. She asks if he still needs to get “Ghost X--I mean, Skulker? I can totally cover for you.”
Danny: Nah, I’d rather ride home with my big sister. If that’s okay.
It’s way okay, little bro. Way okay. Besides, Jack and Maddie deserves their alone time. Maddie kings Jack by the way and I mean checkers, not sex. Proving Jazz has the Fenton gene, Maddie, too, does a victory dance, literally shaking her booty. Jack’s just pissed he lost.
To "Secret Weapons" ReviewTo "Flirting with Disaster"
Back to Episodes Page
Article written in: Oct. 5, 2008
Layout design by OKami_hu, 2009